Pst, don't tell!

A few posts ago I told you that I was upset. And I still am.
Are you mentally prepared for the 'hard truth' for which a very few people know (or wants to know)?

The cause is something that we heard in our news... First, I spent some time thinking whether I should say something about it on my blog, as this blog is focused on more positive, creative side of our lives, and whose main task is to promote creativity and creative thinking. But since I was actually brought here just because of these 'issues', I said that it is ok to write about it here.
The 'issues' are called victims.

As we heard in the news, there was one case, where the court acquitted the priest, because the 'touching of girls was not sexual harassment'. Why? Since in the act there was no 'sexual instinct' in the perpetrator and it was 'irrelevant factor how the injured party perceived his offense'.
If these allegations are well read, then I hope you understand why it upset me.

Luckily there was a columnist who then described the matter as it should be - for Dummies, that everyone understood why we (some of us) were upset! If possible, please read her article in our newspaper Dnevnik, on Tuesday, 22.2.2011 under the heading 'Guilty'. Tanja Lesničar - Pučko explains that touching and interfering in the intimate area IS harassment of any individual!

Anyway, I will not go into details, because the article really tells everything, so I will not repeat its contents.

I would like to say something else...

Because such things happen the victims in our country are what they are. Guilty, guilty, guilty.
In my 10-year career working with victims and witnesses of serious crimes, 90% of them told me that they were sorry to report the crime. Because they were regarded as having committed the crimes, as if they themselves were looking for and asking for what happened to them, whether it was a street robbery or rape. I saw many who went home without having someone who would help them. What have these victims done at home? What choices they had: to swallow as many pills as possible in order to 'forget' the event or lock into the apartment to close themselves of this World. And because we don't see the victims, they don't exist!
How many victims actually call for help themselves?
Who sends them somewhere for help and where?
Do not tell me that they have available SOS-telephones. - Tell me rather who keeps records, what happens to these people after they are 'nicely' treated by the Police and when they go home. How many of these people call for help?
Who is actually helping the victims in a professional way to get internal balance...?

What I saw how some people work with the victims and witnesses of crime, and what the victims told me, has prompted me to go. Because I was sick when I saw how the victims were treated. The victims or perpetrators - they talked to them the same. Yes, all the same: the same people were having 'interviews' with the perpetrators and with the victims. In the same way. Everything is suspicious, everything is not-true, all is 'oh not so bad', everything is irrelevant... And such people think they know everything, they don't need someone to remind them of something or to propose to work better. No, they already know everything. And they also know that the victims are too weak to complain about how they are treated...

How many of us know or want to know what happens to victims? Since the victims are quiet and hidden from the World, they are not existing. And, yeah, they are ok in a day or two anyway...
Anyone who studies the psychology, human brain, emotions, etc. knows the real effects of the crime. He/She knows that the victims may be going through this:

And let me tell you that this is 'mild' way what victims are doing to themselves. What the victims do to themselves if they are not heard, is difficult to explain, because often we think that it is not true. And the perpetrators exploit our ignorance. Or, the victims become perpetrators...

I am upset how our government treats the victims. I will do my best to change something, even if it will happen just before I die. I left the institution that should have provided the confidence, security, assistance, expertise, because I saw that that was not true and that I won't reach my goal: to help the victims of crimes. Therefore, I decided to open my own business Creatissimo, although I (the way I see it now) will have a long road to achieve my original goal.

I am thankful for people who are already working on this, as they give me an example and hope. I now believe that my goal is tangible. Thank you to keep on going!

(Cathy Malchiodi is my big idol)

I hope I did not spoil your (happy) day. I didn't write as much as I wanted, because I hope that you will read between the lines. I want to let people know what is happening and I hope that professionalism will override all those smart 'blah-blah-blah's' how they all work 'oh-so-hard' on this field and how professional their work is. And this is only a fraction of what I might have written on this topic...

Stay brave! :)

Posted on March 10, 2011 and filed under art therapy, creative process, misc, victims.